Zombies in Love: Weiss in Paris
by Marippe
Summary: AU Parody. YxKxO, YxKxOxFxN, SxCxAxFxN. Zombies!


Zombies in Love Disclaimer: This is a parody. It has implied Youji x Ken x Omi, Youji x Ken x Omi x Nagi x Farfarello, Schuldich x Aya and Crawford x Schuldich x Farfarello x Nagi x Aya. And zombies. Zombie sex = ratings! 

**Zombies in Love: Weiss in Paris**

-------------------- 

Omi Tsukiyono scampered around the Paris apartment he shared with his lovers. "Ken, Youji! Where are you, my sweeties?" 

He heard the voice of one of his lovers answer from the bedroom, "We're in here, love!" 

"Kenken!" Omi yipped, happily, dashing through the bedroom door and flopping down on the bed and squeezing his way in between the athletic Ken and the super-sexy Youji. "Yohtan! I looooooove you!" He then planted a kiss on each of their cheeks. 

Kissing him sweetly, Youji asked, "So are we still on for the gay swinger's club tonight?" 

Ken's eyes glistened hornily, "You bet!" 

"Aya!" Omi called. 

"Oui, monsiour?" Aya appeared, holding his feather duster as usual. 

"Please prepare our clothes for this evening," Omi said. 

"Yes, of course," Aya nodded and went to prepare for the evening's events. 

"He's such a good maid!" Youji exclaimed. 

"And she's so cute, too," Ken smiled. 

"He's just stunning in that maid's uniform," Omi agreed. "She may be dressed as a woman but the fact he's packing cock makes him so much more appealing!" 

*** 

Nagi's eyes scanned the club, looking for an appropriate target. Nudging his partner, the mad scientist, Farfarello, he whispered, "Them. Over there." 

Looking in the direction Nagi was gesturing, Farfarello saw them. A group of silly looking boys. One was tall and lanky and radiated with sex appeal. Another was shorter, brown-haired and athletic-looking. The third was a young-looking with bright blue eyes. They were all dancing together, gyrating and swaying their hips to the music. "They're perfect," Farfarello hissed. 

Nagi hooked his arm around Farfarello and, then giving him a loving look, said, "Let the experiment begin!" 

*** 

Meanwhile, on the other side of the room, a sultry German was eyeballing a shy looking she-male by the bar. After a few moments of this silent flirtation, he decided it was time to seal the deal. 

"Hey, baby, how ist you doing?" he said as he sidled up to the sweet-looking young transvestite. 

"I'm fine, monsieur," the red-head answered softly, his gaze not yet meeting the German's own. 

"Ja. That's gut. May Ich buy du a drink?" the German asked. 

"Please tell me your name first. I'm Aya," the she-male said, finally introducing herself. 

"Beautiful name," the German answered slickly. "Meine name ist Schuldich." 

Aya giggled sweetly and he and Schuldich continued their flirtation, oblivious of the happenings across the room. 

*** 

Nagi and Farfarello had introduced themselves to the polyamorous group of boys, Omi, Ken and Youji. They danced and talked for a while before asking the most important question. "So," Nagi asked. "Would you like to do a little partner swap?" 

By that time, all three of the other boys were practically salivating. "Of course," they said simultaneously. 

Farfarello and Nagi then led them to a back room. "Please prepare yourselves for intercourse," Farfarello told them. "I would like to do you up the butt now." Excitedly, the boys began to undress while Farfarello and Nagi discreetly applied their SECRET POTION to their nether regions. Oblivious to this, Ken, Omi and Youji prepared themselves for a delicious orgy. 

*** 

A half hour later, a satisfied looking Nagi and Farfarello emerged from the room. Exchanging a triumphant glance, they scurried upstairs to wait in their secret gay swingers' club lair for the events of the evening to proceed. 

A few moments later, Youji, Ken and Omi came stumbling out of the room, looking slightly greener than they had when they gone in. Their arms stretched out in front of them, "Butt...sex....butt...sex....butt...sex." They chanted. 

"Gimme five!" Farfarfello cried. 

Slapping Farfarello's outstretched hand, Nagi declared, "Mission accomplished! Our butt-sex-seeking zombies experiment worked! Soon there will be a slave race of flamingly homosexual undead! BWAHAHAHAHAHA!" Farfarello began laughing, too. They were hysterical with mad scientist glee. 

Youji attacked a man dressed up as a cowboy, "Bend you...over...make you...my bitch...," he said. 

Omi closed in on his partner, dressed up as a rodeo clown, saying, "Sweet...sweet...butt loving." 

Ken was making his way over the bar where a German man and a trans-sexual appeared to be having a tiff with a loud man in a white suit. 

"What the hell are you doing, Schuschu?" yelled Crawford, shaking his long-time German lover, roughly. "Why are you trying to cheat on me with some cheap tart?" 

"I'm not a tart! I'm a maid! I am an expert in my field!" Aya protested. 

"Ja," agreed Schuldich. "Das ist true. Ich can't deny that s/he's very gut at what s/he does." 

Before Crawford could retort, he noticed something over Schuldich's shoulder. "What the hell is that?" 

"Was?" asked Schuldich, turning around. 

"Oh, no!" cried Aya, seeing the drooling, chanting green man. "Monsieur Ken has been turned into a butt-sex-seeking zombie!" 

"Damn!" Schuldich and Crawford exclaimed simultaneously. "Nagi and Farfarello have decided to attack Paris!" 

Turning to explain the situation to Aya, Schuldich said, " Craword and I are secret agents seeking to stop the two mad scientists, Nagi and Farfarello, who have been turning men into butt-hungry zombies all over the world!" 

Explaining further, Crawford added, "The only way to stop the zombies is to bend them over and make them OUR bitches before they can make us theirs!" 

"Let's go!" cried all three, their differences forgotten. Upstairs in the secret lair, Nagi and Farfarello were foiled! 

*** 

It took some time but sooner or later, all the zombies were turned back into regular men. 

"Thank you sooooo much!" Omi squealed, glomping them. Ken and Youji stood behind, holding hands, also looking grateful. 

Schuldich and Crawford cracked their knuckles, "All in a day's work, my boy. All in a day's work," Crawford stated, modestly. 

Suddenly, an angry Nagi and grumbling Farfarello came running down the stairs, "How DARE you!" Nagi yelled. "The only thing the world doesn't have enough of are zombie flamers!" 

"Nein," Schuldich said. "The world doesn't have enough love." 

"Love?" repeated Farfarello. 

"Yes," Crawford told him. "Love. Perhaps you two would like to join Schuldich and me in America. We would be lovers and oh so happy." 

"That would be...nice," said Nagi. 

"Group hug!!" cried Farfarello. The four hugged each other like there was no tomorrow. 

"Awwwww," sighed Omi, Ken and Youji, holding each other tight as well. "I just love it when a foursome gets together." 

Aya sniffled. Reaching out for him, Crawford said, "I'm sorry for calling you a tart. Maybe you'd like to come to me America, too!" 

"Oui!" he cried, jumping into the middle of the hug. 

With that, all eight of them left the club. "You know what we should do now?" asked Youji. 

"What?" asked Aya. 

"Blow this place up!" Omi yelled. They all agreed. Then they blew up the club. 

"RATINGS!" all eight of them shouted. 

THE END!!! 


End file.
